oceans. [4.29.08]

I went to the ocean today. It is one of my favorite things. There’s something about the ocean that makes me think, that makes me wonder. Thoughts come easy in the roar of the tide and the sweeping waves. 

There’s a line that Jamie Tworkowski quotes in his blog: 
“I’m starting to believe that the ocean is much like You, because it gives and it takes away.”  I have been reminded of that quote this week, but the ocean pounded it home. 

There’s a line in a Switchfoot song: “All my sandcastles spend their time collapsing.” On the ocean, we often build castles. And then we watch, with a sentimental sadness, as the ocean sweeps them away. It’s kind of like life, I guess.

I lost a sandcastle this week. It’s easy to question why. To wonder when you look at the pieces and emptiness where something real, something important once stood. 
“But God, why? I wanted that. I needed it.”
And it’s funny, I can almost hear God laughing. 
“Since when do you really know what you want and what you need? I have something so much better. Just trust me, ok? Let me show you.” 

Waves have always mystified me. I love jumping in them. I love the feel of them rushing past. When you’re deep in the water, you can jump into the waves. There’s a moment when you feel weightless, when the wave sweeps you backward and you lose your footing. It’s like when God changes something in life. We all have these grand illusions, these dreams, and then God comes and sweeps them away. And you have a choice: you can either fight the wave, or you can jump with it. But no matter what you choose, the wave is greater than you. 

A wave came into my life early this week. It was easy to fight and to question. But at the beach, I was reminded that if you only trust, if you only jump, that wave will carry you further than you could ever dream. 

I’m jumping. I’m trusting. In the midst of pain and worry, the ocean reminds me not to doubt. That this sweeping away of my plans just means God has something different planned. Different, but better. It’s what is best and I’m excited for it. 

One castle of mine is gone, but there’s a whole beach full of sand, and God is inviting me to come and watch Him build castles by the ocean.